So I went.

It was scheduled from 9:00am to 9:30pm and I bailed around 2:30. I found that five hours was plenty this go-around. And the “spiritual meeting” was last on the agenda — and was something that I had no desire to see, hear or feel.

I ran into several close companions and mission buddies — Rodriguez, Emerick, Brino, Serra, Neves, Homolka and Gava and it was truly a great experience. I felt so welcomed and we all shed a few tears, choked on a few laughs and shared remembrances.

This emotional pleasantness reminded me that real relationships are built on trust, mutual respect and friendship — and that those outlast and outweigh anything built solely on mutually-shared beliefs.

While I was asked several times if I was, “married, have children?” I responded that I was not married and had no children. And then came the , “Were you ever married?” followed by, “Just didn’t find the right one?”

I happily agreed that they had hit it on the head and we left it at that. This was not the time nor place to discuss my sexuality or my relationship with my honey. Those who are my friends on Facebook should have already figured it out — and seem to have no problems with “it” or me (and four of these are listed above).

Only one former missionary and his wife asked me, “So, Elder, are you still “firm” in the church?” — fully expecting that I would say yes.

When I responded, “No.” they actually flinched and then he said, “That makes me very sad”.

I responded that I was very happy and that he had no reason to be sad on my behalf.

They both thought carefully for a moment and then we continued our conversation in another direction, with me not perceiving any appreciable change in how they were treating or talking to me.

I had expected the worst today and was willing subject myself to this reunion in order to gut-check my own feelings, beliefs and emotions.

I did okay.

So we were having brunch with our friend this morning and he said, “We were at the library for the candlelight vigil for Mary Geequality last week…”.

I wondered who Mary was, how she had died and why he acted as if we should know her.

Then I realized what he had actually said.

I’m glad we have friends who support Marriage Equality

I just accepted an invitation to attend the 80th birthday of my first mission president, along with a mission reunion to take place at the same time, in Campinas, SP, Brazil. Coincidentally, I was already going to be in Brazil for work (which is not that odd, since I am every month) and figured I should take advantage of this opportunity.

I have mixed feelings about this, but based on my conversation with my dear friend and former mission companion last week in Vienna, decided to confirm my attendance.

My friend simply stated that he feels that “my mission” is to challenge members of the LDS church by simply being myself and showing them that gay people are not the bugbears that they are taught and/or believe them to be.

This should be interesting.

And I refuse to wear a white shirt and tie.

Today marks our 25th Anniversary together.

I still love this guy with all of my heart.

Us in April 1988

My honey and I begin planning our 25th anniversary celebration(s) last night and I ended up booking us first class tickets on United Airlines in late March to Prague. Neither of us had ever  been there and for some reason as I looked through the world destinations available to me as a Premier 1K with lots of miles, that city caught my eye.

Within hours of posting about it on Facebook, dozens of friends and family commented affirmatively on the decision — many of them having previously experienced this old European city. I guess I feared more “You may want to rethink that”s or “We hated Prague” comments, but was please to see none.

This year also marks my honey’s 50th birthday and we are thinking of planning a “50/25″ party similar to the one we did for my 50th and our 20th anniversary in 2008. I suspect we may do that in July to avoid weather-related travel for those of our loved ones who chose to traverse I-80.

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On another note, the US Supreme Court has determined to hear two key cases revolving around marriage equality on March 26th and 27th. Wouldn’t this be a good year to be able to actually legalize and legitimize our relationship?

A bright and humorous group have created a parody website of Mormons and Gays website, which the LDS church launched this past week.

It is nicely titled Mormons and Negroes and turns the tables right where they should be turned.

I pasted the link on Facebook and a Brazilian LDS acquaintance from some 35 years ago quickly protested:

Not for Brazilians LDS , great part of brazilian population has some black blood, so we have no problem at all !!! We like everybody , black, white, yellow, straight, not straight, everybody !! We are all the same, aren’t we???

I responded, …”most LDS (and most people I know) feel as you do, but the point of this parody is to show that something that is immutable and that you did not choose (e.g. skin color, sexual orientation) cannot be considered a sin. Nothing more, nothing less. The LDS church’s new website (mormonsandgays.org) claims being homosexual is not a choice — but acting on it is a sin. You can’t have it both ways — hence my comment on a double-edged sword (faca de dois fumes).”

I expect to arrive in São Paulo tomorrow to a Facebook firestorm (and perhaps a few less Facebook friends).

I’ve been back in São Paulo all week and am feeling more and more like I live here. Instead of being able to just go to my hotel room and vegetate, friends invite me to dinner, lunch, to walk in the park, etc. This has subtly changed over the year and I think they are thinking more of me as just “one of the group” instead of “the foreigner visiting our country”.

While I actively participate in conversations when I have something to add, for the most part I listen and absorb new contextual words, slang, thoughts and a general sense of Brazilian cotidian life.

Yesterday three of us went to the Mercadão — an old and very large indoor market in the old downtown area. Not since I went to Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade in New York in 1985 have I been in such a large, crowded group of people: Literally bumping elbows and shoulders and hips at every turn and at every step through the masses of people shopping, eating, playing and generally enjoying life.

While I can’t think that I was the only one in this crowd of thousands feeling claustrophobic, I suspect I may have been the only one showing it on my face!

Walking from place to place, we were able to taste different (and for me, exotic) fruits and to see huge swaths of color and feel the vibrancy and sound and ambiance.

I would love to have had my honey here, but suspect that he would have freaked out with the sheer numbers of people and inability to navigate quickly.

I woke up in São Paulo to a very foggy morning and even though it is now noon, the haze has not completely burned off.

I spent a couple of hours walking around Parque de Ibirapuera and taking photos. Many great shots incorporated the fog, so this set of photos is not just more of the same.

Yesterday I had a meeting at the HQ building for my company’s parent company and got to experience a different part of the greater city. The area was an older town with small, narrow streets and many corporations have built (and continue to build) large modern buildings there. It’s amazing to see the amount of construction going on in this city!

An old Brazilian mission buddy of mine has sent me a message saying that he will call me tonight after he gets off work. Elder Fóz was laid up in the mission office for several weeks in 1979 with knee surgery and we became friends at that time. I haven’t seen nor spoken to him since then, so it will be interesting to see where he is in his life.

Many old mission companions and friends are on Facebook and I see their incessant posts bragging about children on missions, temple marriages, their callings. etc. Reminds me of old friends who are still “dragging Grand” in Laramie — something they did in high school but without ever outgrowing those “glory years”. I feel like I have graduated and moved on. Many in Brazil have contacted me and want to talk, but I really have nothing to share with most of them and am not really ready to rehash the mission and “what happened to you since?” question.

I’m back home in Salt Lake City again and am enjoying a nice, quiet weekend with my honey. We had dinner with a friend on Friday night, visited my cousin and his fiancé  and another friend yesterday afternoon, went to see Xanadu at the Grand Theatre last night and had brunch with friends this morning.

Ok–not that quiet of a weekend.

My honey leaves for Dublin on Wednesday, and as far as I know, I am home for a couple of weeks at least. We’ll see what Monday brings…

Today is the first day of our 2012 spring and the weather has turned lovely, even though it snowed again overnight. Recently, we have had a slate of 70 degree days, followed by two or three of snow and blustery winds, followed by more warm days. Odd stuff this year.

I returned from my latest trip to Brazil (and third this year) on Friday and my honey and I celebrated our 24th anniversary on Saturday with a quiet day of just spending time together. We have now officially been a couple for half of his lifespan (and just less than half of mine). It is hard to imagine how time has gone by so fast and it seems to speed up even more year after year.

I look forward to many more years together and am very happy with the decisions in my life that have lead to this moment with this person.